humor Quotes

Have you noticed the physical resemblance between Imran Khan and Gaddafi? If you were making a movie of the life of Gaddafi and you wanted a slightly better-looking version of Gaddafi, you might cast Imran Khan.

I'm bored with that line. I never use it anymore. My new line is 'In 15 minutes everybody will be famous.'

I remember the first time I heard a teenager say 'LOL.' Just what? But it means 'laugh.' Why don't you just laugh? What are you doing?

I have Social Disease. I have to go out every night. If I stay home one night I start spreading rumors to my dogs.

I like to think 'The God Delusion' is a humorous book. I think, actually, it's full of laughs. And people who describe it as a polarizing book or as an aggressive book, it's just that very often they haven't read it.

I had rather have a fool to make me merry than experience to make me sad and to travel for it too!

If you pretend to be good, the world takes you very seriously. If you pretend to be bad, it doesn't. Such is the astounding stupidity of optimism.

I've always said, 'If you need Viagra, you're probably with the wrong girl.'

Seth Meyers is highly overrated as a comedian.

I think I have always had a little humor.