humor Quotes

I suppose society is wonderfully delightful. To be in it is merely a bore. But to be out of it is simply a tragedy.

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.

Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.

When the gods wish to punish us they answer our prayers.

I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world.

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.

The difference between literature and journalism is that journalism is unreadable and literature is not read.

Arguments are extremely vulgar, for everyone in good society holds exactly the same opinion.

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.